For two years, I did what I thought I was supposed to do. I posted “authentically” in various online spaces. I hosted a podcast. I wrote for other blogs. I did all of those things, and it was just … not me. Bits and pieces of it were. But the stuff that drained me was not balancing the stuff that invigorated me.
I am Democrat. You are Republican. Peace depends on me.
I am a woman, you are not; peace depends on me.
I am a Christian, you are not; peace depends on me.
In a recent Blue Bloods episode, Danny reveals a family pact the adults all made the day their children were born: We made the choice to bring you into the world. You didn't make the choice, we did. So a bargain was struck that day that you owe us nothing and we owe you everything.
He's right. We owe our children everything. …
Our Life Story is made up in fractions. However, since we forgot everything we learned in third grade math I think sometimes we get stuck and think that PART of our story is going to end up being our WHOLE story. But that's not the case. Basic math tells us that PARTS and WHOLES are very different, and that one piece does not define the whole pie.
We pray and hope and work for things that we want. We receive blessings and bad days and more blessings. Sometimes--once in a blue moon, as far as I've ever experienced--those blessings arrive *precisely* how I imagined they would. Most of the time those blessings are quite different from what I pictured. Sometimes that's okay. Sometimes I utter, "That's not what I meant," and I have to dig a little deeper to find the gratitude I know I should be feeling.
You know who shouldn't have to learn how to listen? Grown-ups. We should be in control of ourselves enough to listen, respect, and engage with one another in an appropriate manner. But since we're not a perfect people, that is not always the case.
Or, if I'm hanging out with that same mom, we could find companionship in our struggles and lean on one another for support and encouragement to improve our relationship. I could say, "I struggle with that, too. It's not just you." Focusing on the commonality and the fact that we could love each other through the mess would be so much more constructive than writing each other off as a snarky witch who cares only about her super-smart kid.
As we walk through life today, let's remember that most people are making it through the best they can. Give a little grace and a little bigger smile, and move about your day.
