Changing Rhythms
Not only did I post a Throwback Thursday (#tbt) on Wednesday, but I’m writing this just seven hours before it lands in your inbox.
Normally, I do (kind of) know the day of the week, and I’m typically done with this blog & the Friday Crew email by Thursday mid-day at the latest.
But starting this week, we’ll see about both of those things because SUMMER BREAK is upon us! And while I am exceedingly grateful for this time with my daughter & husband, I’m also a little … spazzy. Evidenced by my spilling half a container of superglue on our glass island this morning … in the middle of helping my daughter make pancakes on a gas stove … while trying to remember what to pack for the amusement park that day.
My daily rhythm is all off for the next 11 weeks, and I know that means I’ll feel more scatter-brained, more harried, and potentially a little more tired for a while while I get used to the new rhythm.
Every personality tends to deal with changing rhythms differently, and that’s okay. What’s most important is that as we process those changes and work to make them work for everyone, we don’t go bonkers and take any frustration out on our people.
How do we ensure that?
We get to know the why behind our specific responses to our changing rhythms, and then we work to make them healthier and more compassionate responses — to ourselves & to our people.
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Enneagram 1
Motivated by: being good & right
Tends to respond to changing rhythms by: Working very hard to control the changing rhythms, oftentimes to the detriment of self & relationships.
Tool to keep in your back pocket: Embrace presence and play. Each day recognize one thing you can’t control for that day, and tell yourself it’ll be okay, that you’ll make it to bedtime in one piece, even not having controlled that one thing.
Enneagram 2
Motivated by: being helpful in order to be appreciated
Tends to respond to changing rhythms by: Typically embraces changing rhythms because it usually involves helping/being with other people.
Tool to keep in your back pocket: This new rhythm might be your chance to recharge, too. Remember: naps are not just for toddlers.
Enneagram 3
Motivated by: status & respect
Tends to respond to changing rhythms by: Making sure that meaningful, productive things are still going to happen throughout the change.
Tool to keep in your back pocket: Remember: rest and play are meaningful and productive.
Enneagram 4
Motivated by: authenticity, uniqueness
Tends to respond to changing rhythms by: Keeping at least one comfort that keeps them feeling like themselves, i.e. a hobby or regimented activity like knitting or steadfastly keeping summer traditions.
Tool to keep in your back pocket: Remember that rigidity with traditions in each season can lead to resentment among those we force to participate in them. Flexibility does not mean you’ve lost yourself.
Enneagram 5
Motivated by: competency & capability
Tends to respond to changing rhythms by: Feeling frazzled and trying to set up a plan.
Tool to keep in your back pocket: Set up a plan that works for you & whomever is in your new rhythm. Remember: you don’t have to go 100% either way; a balance of their needs & wants with yours will be critical to surviving and enjoying your new rhythm. And keep a calendar so you know what’s coming; that will lessen the frazzled feelings.
Enneagram 6
Motivated by: safety & security
Tends to respond to changing rhythms by: Making sure any possible/potential danger in the changing rhythm is planned for.
Tool to keep in your back pocket: A new rhythm is an opportunity for growth and fun. Choose to rest in that over the potential disasters it could come with.
Enneagram 7
Motivated by: fun, avoiding pain and boredom
Tends to respond to changing rhythms by: Indulging in a preferred activity or treat, or double-downing on whatever they consider fun and free.
Tool to keep in your back pocket: Involve anyone who is in the new rhythm with you in your preferred activity/fun things.
Enneagram 8
Motivated by: feeling strong, avoiding weakness & vulnerability
Tends to respond to changing rhythms by: Showing complete control and composure, and training themselves inwardly to accept the new rhythm.
Tool to keep in your back pocket: Repeat: I can be content without having complete control. I can be content without having complete control.
Enneagram 9
Motivated by: peacemaking & peacekeeping, internally & externally
Tends to respond to changing rhythms by: Going with the flow and making it as peaceful as possible for everybody.
Tool to keep in your back pocket: If you have a specific want or need during this new rhythm, carve out space and time to at least talk about it with someone you trust. If it’s possible, go for it. If it’s not, at least you’ve hashed it out instead of pushing it aside.
More for you…
My favorite Enneagram assessments:
FREE Your Enneagram Coach (faith-based)
FREE Truity Enneagram Personality test (not faith-based)
Paid: RHETI Institute
Remember: Assessments are a *component* of figuring out your Enneagram type, but reading type descriptions is really how to nail it down.
Get the Typing Guide right here or in the form below. Figuring out your Enneagram number is a great way to start figuring out why you say, do & think the way you do. It’s a great way to learn that you’re not weird, you’re just you. And we need you.
Still looking for more? Shoot me an email & we can talk about coaching!